Dzień dobry Everyone…………………….
Karen’s question was like an eye opener to me, like the clear sky after a heavy storm, like the rising sun after a dark night, like the birth of a baby after hours of pain.
Everything was clear to me, my aim, my path, my decision.
That unusual pain was gone, leaving behind a sense of satisfaction, a contentment that was no more futile, everything was making sense to me.
I was a whole different person, the smile of my lips was back, but this time with a meaning, a meaning that is worth of its existence.
Karen said, “I know this is not feasible in real life, it is only possible to say good things, but it is hard to carry that out in reality. Anyway, let us end this here. Let us not waste time thinking and talking of those stuffs that are worthless.”
I said, “hold on”,” breath” and “why”?” why is the good things that we say are not feasible in real life? why do you think it is worthless to speak about the right? Why do you think the easy way will always give the result?”
“Why don’t you understand the path might be uneven now but when we follow it till the end, it will give us a concrete result, a result that we earned, a result that is yours, a result that will give you immense happiness and more than that a result that would define you as a whole, you will only have the right on it and no one else.”
Karen was speechless, she could not speak. she gazed at me as if I am giving her the lessons of life.
She with a choked voice said “water”. I gave her the glass of water. She had the glass of water cleared her throat and sat on the couch taking a deep breath. She looked at me and then the window, again looked at me asked me “what do you mean?”
I was like” was I saying all these with a mute button on?” (I said to myself of course).
I replied, “I mean what I said”.
She asked, “What does it mean in your case, what do you want to do with your life, your aim.”
I firmly said, my aim is the same, my path might have a bit of twist! I want to become something because of who I am, not because of my dad’s money. I will sell my project that I made. I don’t know how much money I will make out of it. I will apply for an education loan and will pursue my education in India. My knowledge and dedication will decide if I am eligible to become a scientist or not, I do not want to buy my career I want to earn it. Also only studying sincerely will not help me, I have to gain day to day experience as well, which I cannot get by living in 5 star AC rooms with all facilities embedded in it, I need to sweat in the same room as that a poor guy who want to be a scientist, else I won’t do justice even if I would get that.
I want a real competition, in the real world, I don’t want to compete from the cocoon build by my dad, my dad did more than any other dad could. I respect that, I love him for what he gave me, but I want to justify him that I deserve to be his daughter. He built this empire with his sweat and blood, did so much hard work to give us this luxurious life, but I doubt if he had enjoyed every bit of it.
But this is his empire not mine, my dad is my hero, I want to be like him by following his footstep not by starting my journey where he ended.
She was all in tears and said “Sweety you know what, that is going to be tough but beautiful, you will fall but rise higher, you will sweat but sleep peacefully”.
You will be the entitled kind not the inherited king.
I got Goosebumps when she said that. it felt good. But only feeling good was not enough, now I have miles to go before I sleep, and for the first time in life this proverb made sense to me. hahahhahaha…
Stay tuned to know what happened next ……
Till then Прощай …………………….